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Last updated: Thursday 18 May 2006
Dad At Large: The lowdown on raising kids Hairy moment for a novice carrot buyer MUMS only have one pair of hands. They tell us so all the time to underline how busy they are. Out to crack the egg hunt clues THE Easter egg hunt has been a family tradition since they were toddlers. Every year, on Easter Sunday morning, we devise a little treasure hunt in the garden which guides our four children to their chocolate eggs. The gift of sharing WHEN kids go on a school trip, you know three things for certain: it's going to cost so much that it needs to be paid in instalments; you'll end up missing them badly no matter how much you look forward to a bit of peace; and they're going to bring you back a really naff present. My morning in Muddle Earth SOME bright spark at school had the inspired idea of telling the kids they could come dressed as literary characters to celebrate World Book Day. Dad At Large: Wrong-footed on the school run MY wife hardly ever puts a foot wrong. When it comes to all matters involving the home and the kids, she reigns supreme - a shining example of calm efficiency. The ifs and butts of short-lived love AS time goes by, there are things I'm not allowed to write about. When the kids were little, I could get away with almost anything. But now they're getting older, I'm censored on the grounds that it's just too embarrassing. When friendship takes flight THEY say dads are just big kids. But some dads are bigger kids than others. Take my mate Phil... It's the thought that counts MEN - no matter how well intentioned - shouldn't try to be thoughtful because they just get themselves into trouble. Let me try to explain... Another man about the house IN the midst of all the hospital dramas we've lived through in the past 15 years of parenthood, my wife has been the one who has held it all together. You only sing when you wiggle HOW times have changed on the sports desk... The conversation used to be rather limited. They were in their own testosterone-charged little world of fixtures, tactics, injury scares and transfer speculation. A sauce of heartbreak IN all of his eight years, Max has never said he loves me. I say I love him nearly every day but all I ever get back is the same dismissive reply: "Yeah, whatever." Losing the rat race THESE are hard times to be a dad - even harder than usual. With my wife going back to work, the pressure has become unbearable. Bored? Get yourself down to the bottle bank 'DAD, I'm bored." It must be the phrase kids say more than any other, with the possible exceptions of "I had it first", "It's not fair" and "Are we there yet?" A stain on the character WHEN you're a dad, stains come with the territory. They're an occupational hazard. When a language problem mushroomed THERE were two things that worried me about going to the South of France for our summer holiday: the flight and the French. How not to bowl a maiden over UNTIL this summer, I'd have put watching cricket on a par with going on one of those excruciatingly dull MetroCentre expeditions which dads have to endure occasionally just to show willing.
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